SPENCER's FIRST Real Swimming lesson!!!

Spencer had taken a a sort of a DADDY and ME kind of class at the swim center before but this year he was old enough to start the real swim class. SO now starting tonight he will go twice a week. Tonight was the first class and he was just a NUT. He had a riot though and he loved it. he looked SO SO SO SO SO funny in his bathing suit which had was red with orange flames and had fire breathing T Rex's on it... He picked it out himself!

Thursday is the annual preschool Mother's Day night... which is fun because I don't really know people there but they all know Bill. But I have sort of bonded with one or two of the moms there... So it will be good to get to know them better... I really like this kid Clark's mom, also Ashton's mom, Matthew's mom and Dylan T's mom. Dylan T, who is one of FOUR DYLANS at the school, actually has TWO moms.... kind of a Rosie O'Donnell thing if you know what I mean, and they are both really really nice and very funny. I love them both. SO I might have a better time than I did at it last year.

There are four Dylans at Spencer's preschool. Also, two Devons (one is a girl) and also a Jaden, a Caden, and an Aiden. But only one Spencer.

DAWGS WE HAVE OWNED

What is it with my family that we get the weirdest dogs ever?

I honestly cannot be sure if they come to us that way, or we make them that way. Here they are, the Chapin Family Pantheon of Batsh*t Crazy Dogs... Enjoy.

Early in our marriage we had BANJO. She was awesome. A Black Lab. In this picture, it was her birthday.... Yeah,, uhmmm we did not have a kid yet....I made that birthday hat myself - hard to believe, I know. Bill looks young here. He had a little more hair and had not yet lost his wedding ring at a Blues Jam. It was almost ten years ago. Banjo was hit by a car outside the shop in San Jose. We were devastated and we got Riley 8 days later.

Then Riley the legendary craziest dog on earth. Named after BB King's middle name, Riley came along before Spencer, and this was taken then, so of course we were still dressing up our dog at this point.. This was taken in the shop in San Jose. We got him from a Rescue org in San Jose, called NARF. We have been making sure to only get rescue dogs ever since then.

Then Boogie, who ate everything in sight... We got him right after Riley went to go live with the Vet. He is named after one of Hooker's dogs. He was a rebound dog, and you know those never work out. Boogie went back to the rescue place where we got him, which is what they want you to do if the dog does not work out in your home. He didn't.



Then Missy, the worst behaved dog on earth. We rescued her from a breeder. She looks so innocent. She was okay until we got the second dog, and then she was the ringleader. I found her an excellent new home where she is the only dog to this 13 year old girl who adores her. I am hoping those people lose my phone number before Thanksgiving, when she likes to walk on the table and ingest entire sticks of butter.

and finally we have Amy:

She is about as normal a dog as we have ever had. What happened there? Though, we notice that she is starting to chase bugs, and might have bit of a crush on the goat...

This is not another dog. This is Spencer on a trip with Bill. He stayed with Bill's parents in Ventura , CA while Bill was working in a friend's and fellow luthier's shop after the house exploded. I just think it is a cute picture of Spencer.

PHOTO OP/ QUESTION THURSDAY***

It is already time again for Photo Op/Question Thursday!!!***
***Now Available on Fridays!!!

Please write the caption for this photo:


AND

answer this contemplative question:

If you could start college over, would you major in something different, and if so, what would it be?


Here are my answers for this week's caption & question that two people at most will probably answer:

Caption:

"You know, if I had to guess, I would say that this Reverend Wright dude is on Hilary's payroll. Seriously. Think about it."

Answer:

I would major in either theater or ceramics and NOT CARE AT ALL if I ever got a high paying job in it, or worry that it was not practical. They were both things I loved to do, and I seemed to have some ability there. I probably would have gone to RISD for Ceramics and who knows where for theatre. I also would have finished college in 4 years maybe, instead of 19 years. However, I listened to my weird parents. As it turned out I wasted many years in nursing school NOT becoming a nurse and then finally got a BS in Marketing, which now does not interest me at all. And I am living with a goat, which has its own set of problems. On the other hand, after 256 liberal arts credit hours, I am not too shabby at Jeopardy. But I still suck at Scrabble.

I have been watching this fascinating series on PBS

It is called CARRIER and it is like a 5 part series where each part is two hours long. I have watched three of the five so far. It is all about life aboard the US Navy Carrier the USS NIMITZ. It is so captivating and it is on all this week on PBS. It profiles people in every rank, pilots, petty officers, cooks, navigators, those guys in the colored shirts that wave the planes on and off the ship.... just everyone. It gives a true glimpse into life aboard an aircraft carrier for 6 months and it is just amazing... I never knew the Navy was SO STRICT.

Anyway you can see parts of it here and read about it and if it is on near you you should watch it. It is SO interesting!!! They have to sleep in teeny weeny beds, and the ship holds 6000 people!!!
http://www.pbs.org/weta/carrier/?campaign=pbshomefeatures_1_carrier_2008-04-30

I learned SO MUCH about the Us Navy. Did you know those planes cost like 60 million dollars? That in one episode a guy went overboard and they searched for him for three days but they never found him... It tells about what they do all day on the ship... its really compelling.

What we did this weekend ***

So this was a typical weekend here at the goat farm On Friday night we held our normal drum circle thing, where we gather in the woods and chant and liberate a bundle of asparagus. On Saturday I got up early and I shaved my dog, and after that we all dressed in leiderhosen and went to Home Depot, where we sat as a family in the parking lot performing for the patrons. Bill played guitar, Spencer danced, I played tambourine and chanted, and Amy our bald dog played accordion. We sang selections from our upcoming Chapin Family Singers album entitled "There is a sale on Wallpaper, and other songs about Home Improvement." This was pretty fun until Home Depot asked us to leave. Later Saturday afternoon we had a late lunch of mutton, pickled herring and gazpacho. Saturday night we did our usual baking of the scones, so we would have plenty to throw at passing cars. Sunday was, as usual, NASCAR day, followed by some Belgian feather bowling and marital counseling.

I love our quiet weekends on the goat farm.

***May or may not be true... Just posting this to see if anyone is actually reading this blog...

PHOTO OP THURSDAY***

1. PHOTO OP THURSDAY
***NOW AVAILABLE ON FRIDAYS!!!

WRITE THE CAPTION FOR THIS PICTURE:

First prize is a week long, some expenses paid trip to a Goat Farm in Oregon, complete with a year's supply of Marionberry Jam, and a slightly charred bathroom vanity.* ++

*granite topped
++faucet not included

Here is my Entry:

"Hi my name is Stefan and for the special this evening we have the Swordfish Involtini for $22.00. It is swordfish sliced thin and wrapped around a stuffing of breadcrumbs, lemon zest, currants, pignoli, sauteed, and finished with a white wine reduction sauce. Would you like to see the wine list?"

NOW YOU WRITE THE CAPTION

2. This is me, in case you have forgotten:

TYDWBLEACH:

• Gender: Female
• Astrological Sign: Capricorn
• Occupation: Whiny (WannaBe) Dilettante
• Location: Goat Farm : Oregon : United States

Interests: bass fishing, cocoa powder, taxidermy, prunes, gymnastics, clog dancing, cellular biophysics, natural gas, needlepoint, Xanax, spelunking, watching spelling bees on TV, Medical transcription, lincoln logs, asthma, culinary history of Sweden, buying things I do not need and cannot afford on the internet.

Met with the Cabinets Guy at the house today.

This is me, in my kitchen, waiting for Bill to get home.

I was sick and did not feel like going, but I went. We pretty much got the same types of cupboards as before with a few changes. I have bronchitis and it is not good and i could not breathe very well today BUT I am on The Drugs. This is day two of The Drugs. One thing we have to change is that we are gonna have to still have a 30 inch cooktop instead of a 36, which means four burners instead of five. Its okay. I will live. Its not like we are feeding an army here.

I am sleepy. The Drugs make me sleepy. And I am sure this post is putting you to sleep.

so here is a question: IF you could switch decades what one would you live in??

What would you do with 15 million tax free dollars?

I would buy a house on Sanibel Island, or Captiva Island in Florida, with a huge pool and a ceramics studio, and pretty much never leave it. Except to get more clay.

What would you do?

Soybean insulation, Denim insulation

It is hard to save the earth when you are NOT Ed Begley. Every little bit counts I guess, but paying $39.00 for a gallon of interior EARTH FRIENDLY paint is not feasible for us. We cannot afford three $400 toilets, or to pay over $10 a Sq Ft for some of the earth friendly flooring options, glass tiles etc. BUT there are products that once put in will save significant amounts of energy and money as far as home energy heating and cooling costs.

There are two types of earth friendly insulation materials we are looking at .

One is called ULTRATOUCH
http://www.bondedlogic.com/ultratouch.htm
and it is recycled denim that has been shredded, cleaned, densely packed and soaked in boric acid. it is fireproof, mildew and mold proof, moisture resistant, and very effective at both sound and insulation. We are going to try to use some of this, and then also use a spray on sealant kind too, made of soybeans. http://www.biobased.net

We are just now researching the costs for these, as opposed to the normal stuff. If they are much higher than regular we will not be able to do it. Also the city has to get on board and right now the city of Portland is, but some of the smaller towns, like the one I LIVE IN, have not quite caught the Green Fever yet. They are not totally down with these newfangled crazy ideas. In other words, Ed Begley is not playing well here in Hooterville. So. We shall see.

All we can do for now is to see how it compares. I wish we could put 200 solar panels ont eh roof, have a solar water heater, fake grass, kooky floors all that stuff. two hybrids int he drive way, this kind of thing... but it is VERY VERY expensive. We are NOT Brangelina here...

We picked out the kitchen cabinets.

New Cabinets.








Granite we picked for our LAST kitchen... we still like it.

KraftMaid, Maple, "Sedona" (AKA "Sonora,") Praline stain.

They are the same exact price, grade and brand as the ones we had, just different style and color. The old cabinets were very nice but we saw them all charred etc and its too hard to get the same ones..

We almost did Cherry instead of Maple but Bill knows ALLLLLLL about wood and said cherry gets kooky after a bit esp since our kitchen is in very bright sunlight. I loved the look of it but our kitchen does have seriously bright sunlight. So we got these. I think they will go well with the granite color. There is still a danger that Bill will try to make guitars out of them one day. So we are not out of the woods yet.

I AM happy about this, I mean, who would not be happy about a new kitchen, a new house, etc? I just realllly liked our old house. It was our HOME. This will become home too, but that will kind of take more work too, you know? I cannot think about this now. I can't, because I have to research wall ovens. I thought this would be a little more fun.


Also we found yet another paint color we like... THIS ONE.
But I am sure we have a lot of arguing left to do about this... stay tuned.

Today they put this black stuff on the house.

I guess it offers a hint at what our house would look like if we painted it completely black. It makes the house look thinner, certainly.

We are still arguing about what color to paint it.

That front door on the house is only temporary.

PLEASE MAKE THIS SONG LEAVE MY HEAD.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pNlmn7vbXBQ

WELCOME TO PHOTO OP THURSDAY

Below is the photo for this week. You look at it, and write the caption. Have fun! Do as many as you wan t.



Here is my entry:


"Look, big dog shaped cloud, I don't care how you slice it, Sylvester Stallone was ROBBED when he did not get the acting Oscar for Rocky in 1976...."

I am extrememly busy for the next few days...

Doing some deadline type stuff for the mediation etc. "Teacher Bill" will be at preschool alllll day tomorrow, so that means to me I have a quiet day to GET STUFF DONE. I like the days when Bill works at the preschool though, because he comes home with really funny stories.

House stuff.

This is the house from the back. Sliding door thing is in. And windows.

They finally installed the Central A/C... NO this is actually a really big fan. I have no idea why it is in the house running but Nick must have his reasons.

Our neighbor Dave returned Spencer's jeep today which had been living in his garage for a year. Spencer is checking under the hood, as the battery is dead. Also, the seats and the tires are a little MELTY, so we do not know if it really runs. But here it is.. In the background you can see the new furnace. it is nice for a change to see a furnace in our garage that does not have yellow Crime Scene Tape around it.

We went there today, and then to hardware store to get Bill a drill bit. But then he went to look at some kind of varnish stuff and as he was taking a can off the shelf it was stuck to a different can and it fell on the floor and spilled all over including onto Bill's Hummer brand YAK shoes. I got these shoes for $15 from Sierra Trading Post, and they are "Hummer" like the car... and made of YAK. But now they are covered in Shellac. SO now they are ShellYak shoes.

For the rest of today it is back in the barn we go to write down more crap onto forms. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
The stupid four wheeler yahoos next door are doing their moto cross crap, and so we get to listen to their big motorcycle engines....

Spencer bought a loud whistle at the hardware store, and a key chain with a dice (die) on it, so that he can "call the dog" Also we went to the dollar store and he got a Frisbee. I got four plastic plates shaped like flowers, some charms blow pops, pop rocks, and some foaming hand soap. He is practicing how to throw it to either the goat or the dog, whomever responds first to the stupid whistle.
Later on we are gonna clean out the goat's water tub thing. It was gross before, but then yesterday Spencer spilled half a pitcher of Cobb into it. Eww

Today we spent some Family Time with The Goat.

Or, at least we tried. The goat actually runs from us, unless we have his favorite treat, Cobb. Spencer and the dog chased him all over that field today while Bill and I sat in one of the barns all day going thru burned crap from Bill's business and filling out forms. It was a hot day today, and it was nice for once, so when we were done later on, after we lost all the daylight, we went to Dairy Queen. We were in the drive thru line, which is always hundred miles long and takes 90 minutes because it is the place to be on a Saturday night in Canby. We were behind a sort of a stinky older large car. We also had the dog Amy in the car, and she had bad gas all day from some new food we have been feeding her. No, it is not the IAMS green bag, which is pretty fart inducing but it s a canned kind that Bill gets by the case. Anyway.. so here is how it went:

Scene: A minivan, waiting in the drive-thru line at Dairy Queen behind a car with bad exhaust fumes. Bill is Driving, I am in the passenger seat, and Spencer is in the middle row with the dog.

Car ahead lurches forward 5 feet

Me: Bill you can pull up now, that guy has gone forward a little.

Bill: I know but I want to stay back here as long as I can because the exhaust smell is so bad.

Me: Oh, yeah you are right.

Silence, then a horrifying smell starts to float around the car.

Me: Oh My GAWD, is that the guy's car or, is that the dog farting again??

Bill: I don't know I think its the dog but it could be that guy's car?!?!

Spencer: That guy sure has a bad stinky dog in his car!!!

AND Scene.

Bill and I tried SO HARD not to laugh but it was pretty hard. Then later Spencer fed his ice cream cone "stump" (as we call them after there is mostly just flat bottom cone left and hardly any more ice cream) to the dog. he has a terrible habit of dropping them on the floor, and I find them a month later all sticky and petrified in the back seat, along with the giant plastic insects and toy cars, ancient French fries and fierce looking plastic dinosaurs that the dog has chewed the tails and legs off of that all live int eh back seat of our cars.

I said, "Spencer! Did you feed the dog the rest of your ice cream?"

" Yes."

I said "But it had paper wrapped around the bottom. You have to take the paper off before you give it to the dog... "

He said, "No, she likes her ice cream cones with the paper on!

Sure, you've heard of MOMA...

....the famous Museum of Modern Art in New York City. But have you heard of its sister museum, MOBA , in Boston, Mass? I am truly surprised Osler did not stop there on his recent trip.

MOBA is the Museum of Bad Art.

http://www.museumofbadart.org

Their Slogan is: "MOBA. Art Too Bad to be Ignored."


I have not been lucky enough to visit, but fortunately for me , and for you, they have a website that displays many of their works:

"Circus of Despair"
You know, I am no art critic, but I feel the despair here.


This is called, simply: Eileen's Uncle Phil
Obviously 'Uncle Phil' is Eileen's euphemism for "the everyman." Just brilliant



This one is called Ronan the Pug
I can just see Ronan's energy



This is entitled: Lady in the Field with Flowers
She may be related to Eileen... or Uncle Phil..




Dog
About this Art In America said: "A remarkable fusion of ski resort and wolf puppy -- stoical in his yellow-eyed silence, frozen beneath the ice-capped peak, Dog eloquently challenges the viewer to rexamine old concepts of landscape."
I could not agree more...
I am not sure if this is a cat or a dog but he sure is a happy little fellow!

Today: Bill, Spencer, William, Mary and Queen Anne

Today Spencer is in the family room with his many many blocks, building stuff and scolding the dog for knocking it over.

Bill is out in the barn, measuring a table for this person in Martha's Vineyard to give an appraisal. We are sending her pictures of this table my Paternal Grandmother had. It got kind of wrecked in the Splosion. We are trying to determine fi it is actually a William and Mary table or a Queen Anne table....................zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz It is like 16 gozillion years old.

I am looking for Library books. Overdue Library books. Yes I am a delinquent and I have let it slide a little. I will probably end up in Library jail, so if you do not hear form me for a bit....

What is a KITLER, you ask?

A KITLER is a Cat that looks like Hitler.

You might assume there would not be a website that features only cats that look like Hitler.

You would be wrong: http://www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com/cgi-bin/seigmiaow.pl

Yes, this may be a stupid post, but where else but here are you going to find a variety of info like this? In one day I have told you there are MANY cats that look like Hitler AND how to cut your electric bill. I do this for YOU, my adoring public, for no extra charge. It is a service I am only too happy to provide.

The title of this blog alone should tell you all you need to know.. about a dog (Boogie - who ate everything in sight) that we no longer own who ate Spencer's (real life) imaginary friend named DONUT.

Sure, you can read the New York Times if you MUST, but you will never get the kind of information from that rag that you get here.

SO Whether you need home energy saving tips, OR anecdotes about life with a four year old, OR captivating stories about and exploding house and the rebuilding of said house, all the from the point of view of a woman who has quite possibly lost her mind, stay tuned.

Lights Lights Lights, WattStopper, Patio Door and Heat/ AC

Today we went to the house at 8 AM and met with the electrician. We went all thru the entire house and told them exactly what lights we wanted where and how many plugs, and where the switches should be and all of that stuff. It was good I guess because now it will be where we want it and everything, but I don't know how that guy is gonna remember all that stuff. But I guess he does it all the time. We did not add much except since we have already lived in the hosue we know exactly what did not work out well before and now it should be better.

We plan to also get these great energy saving things that are like motion sensors on the lights of every room. You set them up for like say 20 minutes or whatever, and THEN, when, for example, your four year old goes to the bathroom right before we leave the house and leaves the light on in there ALLLLL DAY, it TURNS IT OFF after 20 min of no activity in there it has like a motion sensor thing on it. You can also set it up to turn the lights ON when you walk in the room, and turn them off when you leave. Its just a way to save energy and money on your light bill.

These things are called: WATTSTOPPER OCCUPANCY SENSORS and you just add them to your light switch I guess. There is info about them here: http://www.wattstopper.com/

In fact though we cannot afford to get half this stuff, here is a list of many ways to "go green" in your home: http://www.environmentalhomecenter.com/productlist.shtml

They also put the patio door in today AND the furnace and central AC.