If it is August in San Jose, CA then it must time for...

The annual KIHN Cert :

http://www.kfox.com/pages/summersendoff.html

Remember Greg Kihn?
"Our Love's in Jeopardy...Baby...... oooooooooh oooooooh oooooooh"

and a couple of other hits in the 80s? He is a DJ on San Jose's KFOX Classic Rock station. He still has a band and he is friends with this guy who owns Souther Lumber, one of Bill's wood guys in San Jose. A few years back they started this contest, I think the first one was 2004. THey have this concert with some famous people, some tribute bands some other stuff.... and they give away a couple of guitars. They chose Bill to make those guitars out of Southern lumber wood, and he has been making them for them every year. The first year they did it the featured band was THE WHO, I cannot remember the next year's ones because I did not live there anymore, but also because I had a toddler, and did not get out much. I MOSTLY these days remember the DEADLINE that Bill has to meet to get these things made in time to get them to Jeff to be photographed etc for the ad campaign. Every year before it hits he is basically a basket case but this year was worse but whatever he got them done. The first year he made four of them, I am not sure how many this time. Each one has been different.

ANYWAY..... The deadline has passed, Bill got them done and now the KIHN Cert is upon us... This year it is a bunch of old bands... like the Doobie Brothers... and some others I cannot remember. I never attended any of the KIHN Certs because for the first one I had a new baby. and the next one we lived here but Bill went down for a lot of them..

CHECK OUT the description of the WOOD on that guitar.... and Welcome to MY world...
"...figured myrtle semihollow mahogany old growth whatever......" he actually talks about wood IN HIS SLEEP. Not that that is a bad thing... I learn a lot.

ANYWAY Follow this link to get info on all the details... There is a picture of one of the guitars they are giving away. But of course I would go this year, but of course I have bigger plans... Its almost time for CORNFEST '07.

Yet, still...... CHAPIN GUITARS RULE, Dude.

P.S.: You know WEIRD AL did a parody of that song and I thought Greg Kihn would have been mad about it But he gave him permission. Turns out Greg Kihn made a LOT of money off weird Al's "I Lost On Jeopardy."

So....What did YOU do during the 1980's?

Just curious.
I did high school and then of course the plan was to also finish college but then of course all of the detours occurred... but here I am. I did go to school for the rest of the 80s and all of the 90s and the first half of the "00s...... But I did mange to finish college. After like 5 schools, 17 majors (I counted once) and 19 years, I finished my B.S. I am not a quitter.
Just in the nick of time, too. Then I married this fine gentleman, then we all got ourselves some big hair with that whole "crispy bangs" thing and moved to Canby and settled down. This look just hit the big time here in Canby, along with acid wash jeans, the rubik's cube and Michael Jackson's "Thriller" album.

Reason number 58 Boogie is a BAD DAWG

He ate the pull cord starter string thing off our lawnmower today. Plus one plastic dinosaur, a beanie baby and half a transformer.

Attorney Visit to house went well..

We gave him the tour, and talked about stuff It was good.

Hopefully they will tear it down some time next week. I will NOT miss the house, which by now has become a monument to disaster...

I want it gone... Faster. Higher. Farther.

The Boy with the Purple Leg..... the dog with the enormous TONGUE

They gave him any choice of color of cast he wanted. he chose purple and thus here he is! The kid before him took RED like Clifford the bog red dog.... and I thought SPencer would take that or CONSTRUCTION ORANGE so he could look like Bob the Builder who is incidentally rebuilding our house. But then at the last minute: Purple.

He is happy and they say he can walk on it somehow but he has to sort of ease his way into walking on it. On the way home from the appointment, to avoid the hideous traffic on I-5 we took 99 (a road) and stopped at Jack in the Box, because we used to go to them all the time inCA but they only have a few in OR and hardly any near Canby or The Faux Chateau, located in Wilsonville - SO we go there once in a while when we pass one. Bill had a burger, I had a monster taco and Spencer had a really awesome fruit cup and some milk. Bill bought him an egg sandwich but he would not eat it..We are trying to get protein into him, but in order to get him to eat stuff we have to bribe him with fruit. Can you imagine that? The kid will do ANYTHING to get fruit. For most kids it is candy or gum or whatever but Spencer would parachute off a tall building for a bowl of canteloupe.

OH and this dog? He now tries to eat soda cans. Greeeeat. In this picture I am demonstrating exactly how I have to fend him off EVERY MINUTE to keep him from licking my face.

I am just happy to have made it thru this summer with my family and my sanity somewhat intact. In a week or so they are going to tear down our house and that will be a good new chapter. I am looking forward to it.

I love Boogie, My dog so much today I painted this portrait of him.....

Ok I did NOT really do this painting. Spencer did. But honestly this dog is SERIOUSLY starting to bug me. He gets into EVERYTHING He eats all of Spencer's toys and he is in general a PITA.
Not only does he eat everything and CONSTANTLY want you to THROW THE BALL THROW THE BALL PLEEEEASE THROW IT THROW THE BALL.... HEY THROW THE BALL OKAY? HEY YOU WANNA THROW THE BALL NOW? HUH? HUH? DO YA? DO YA WANNA THROW IT??? AND I WILL CATCH IT OK? THROW IT OK?

NOT only did he EAT his BED on the very first night but now he has KENNEL COUGH this horrible DOG COLD they get where he makes this coughing sound that is endless and loud enough to WAKE the DEAD. It sounds like he is one of those old guys outside of a gas station who has finally quit smoking after like 62 years. It sounds like he will expel his lung just any minute it will come out...

There is NO CURE for it... it just has to RUN ITS COURSE for like ten days...So now I have this spastic dog with a hacking cough and I know I JUST KNOW that any day now he is going eat like a freaking transformer or a little car or something and I will have to pay like $6000 for some DOG OPERATION....

BUt we cannot take him back now. Spencer likes him, and not only did his house blow up, his other dog went away and now he has a broken leg, so we cannot take this dog away from him. SO now he we just have to learn to live with this goofy, hacking, licking, spastic, In Your Face, jumping up, toy eating, garbage tipping nightmare of a dog.
Woof.

WOW I NEED A BETTER CAMERA!!!!!!

Here are some pics my firend Siri took at the water park JUST before the "incident."

At least he was having a blast... the kid with him is.. Uhmmm Donut...

It was fun while it lasted but Osler should be back in town soon..

And then you can get back to a REAL BLOG. hahahahah

Spencer is getting his cast put on tomorrow He is struggling with not being able to run around in total chaos but other than that he is okay. When we need to take him someplace we can use the wagon but also we have a baby Jogger that holds a kids up to 70 lbs and it DID NOT get blown up!!! Tomorrow he will get his permanent cast ( they only do a splint at first because of swelling) and then on Thursday our GREAT attorney that Iplawguy got us, Joel is coming to see the SPLODED house. I should go there with the WIndex today probably, since I wrote "BITE ME CANBY TELECOM" on the back door in ballpoint pen. Very Mature of me... Then soon they are going to tear down the house. I am going to take the day off work and bring a linch because I seriously cannot wait I need this to be OVER. SOON.

SO I really hope you all had fun on my blog But Osler is back in town and I know you all missed him. I sucked at it anyway.

Here is one last picture of Mr Spence in his sick bed but I will probably end this blog in a couple of days. I MAY wait until the CORN FEST is over so you can all see what a CORN CANNON really is. I cannot wait to find out myself.

Haiku /Corny Joke Friday..... I am going to regret this....

Well its here!!!!!

In addition to Haiku this week, you must also come up with one corny joke. OR many....

Here are some topics:

Osler kidnapped by Donut, taken to Cuba
potty training
corn cannons
corn
berries
Pies
worms
goats
closing of Toney Baloney's
espionage
Mamie at the B-52s
Mrs. CL's Grandma's cobbler
Spencer the goat farmer

here is my Corny joke:

What did Cinderella say when her pictures did not arrive?
Someday, my prints will come.

Here is my haiku:

Y'Ain't gonna catch me
shuckin' that corn. Not with those
worms lying in wait.....

Now its YOUR turn

Haiku is 5 syllables, then 7 then 5

and the cornier the joke, the BETTER
The winner gets to pick next week's winner... AND the judges are the winners of LAST week..

Remember you have to pick best joke AND haiku

MMMMMmmmmm... Pie!

Have a look at the very first Berry pie I have ever baked. The berries came from Betty the Corn lady's farm stand and were grown blocks from my exploded house. The crust... well I Uhmmm that came from uhmmm... Fred Meyer and Pillsbury, but COME ON!!!! I am a busy woman... I cannot be bothered making CRUST.

But anyway the Berries they are these giant blackberries. and here is the pie and here is the exact recipe but I would change a few things the next time I make it.

The recipe is below but FIRST I would add the sugar to ALL of the berries ( and use maybe 5 cups of berries instead of four) and let it sit for a bit. I also would slightly increase the amount of sugar maybe to 2/3 instead of 1/2 cup. Also, I would add the flour JUST before I put the mixture into the crust and mix it up but add the sugar way ahead to let it sort of mingle with the very tart berries for a bit. The rest is easy... then just before baking but after you put the top crust on, you should reconsider the amount of sugar to add to that... 1/4 c of milk is a LOT and so is the amount of sugar. it kind of drowns the crust a bit...

But I digress: Here is the recipe

Blackberry Pie

INGREDIENTS

• 4 cups fresh blackberries
• 1/2 cup white sugar
• 1/2 cup all-purpose flour
• 1 recipe pastry for a 9 inch double crust pie
• 2 tablespoons milk
• 1/4 cup white sugar

DIRECTIONS

1. Combine 3 1/2 cups berries with the sugar and flour. Spoon the mixture into an unbaked pie shell. Spread the remaining 1/2 cup berries on top of the sweetened berries, and cover with the top crust. Seal and crimp the edges. Brush the top crust with milk, and sprinkle with 1/4 cup sugar.
2. Bake at 425 degree F (220 degrees C) for 15 minutes. Reduce the temperature of the oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C), and bake for an additional 20 to 25 minutes.

Sooo... the jury is in... Donut took Osler to Cuba...

Well I know a guy who goes to Cuba all the time, He is from Michigan and he leaves from Canada. He stays there for like weeks on end and its pretty scary at times but he loves it. He has been followed, and harassed and the people there are great but really paranoid.

I would never ever ever be adventurous enough to go there... The fact that there is really no diplomatic relationship with the US means that if anything does happen to you over there you are pretty much on your own. Too scary for me. But we all know that Donut is deep into the dark world of espionage. He is an agent for the Montessori faction of the toddler underground, a most elite unit, where everyone speaks seven languages, can hide in plain sight and is potty trained. It is my belief that he took Osler to a compound outside of Havana, where he is being interrogated on his knowledge of Lost In Space.

Types of berries that are grown in Canby, OR

Strawberry, raspberry, blackberry, blueberry, boysenberry, dewberry, gooseberry, loganberry, marionberry (a cross between the Chehalem and Olallieberry blackberries), tayberry, youngberry, and lingonberry.

ANd there are like hundreds of places you can go to PICK YOUR OWN!!!!!!! Not just in Oregon though. The following site has a list of farms all over the place. There's one near you!!!!

AND not only that I took thos blackberries and made TWO pies tonight with them. Yes, I BOUGHT the crusts... I'm not CRAZY... BUT I made them They are in the oven right now and I am sure they will be either reaally great or Reallly bad.

PickYourOwn.org
Where you can find a pick-your-own farm near you!

Who will you vote for for President?

Its a tough call, I know... I doubt I will vote for a republican.
I have too many items in my house from IKEA now to go back.

I am thinking maybe Guiliani. His kooky wife is growing on me. The more crap they say about her, the more I like her....


How about you? And questions number two: Is there ANYTHING scarier than a clown????

NOt to deter from Haiku Friday but... BREAKING NEWS!!!!!

Bobby Brown Believes He's Still a Target for Bin Laden

R&B star Bobby Brown is still convinced Osama Bin Laden wants him dead so he can marry Whitney Houston - 11 months after the singers officially separated. Brown's 14-year marriage to Houston came to an end when their divorce was finalised earlier this year, but the hitmaker remains adamant he is on the al Qaeda leader's hitlist. He even hired extra security to guard him on his recent tour of Australia. He tells the New York Daily News, "I figure if Bin Laden wants me, and everybody is looking for him, it probably won't happen. But if he wants to try and find me for something so stupid, he can do what he wants. I have to leave it in the hands of my higher power. Come on, if anybody (else was) threatened by Al Qaeda, they'd take it seriously."

Michael Jackson Sells Beatles Song for Use in Diaper Ad

Superstar Michael Jackson has licensed the use of the Beatles' song "All You Need Is Love" for a series of new advertisements - for a diaper company. The hitmaker still has a stake in the music publishing company Sony/ART, which owns the rights to the Fab Four's back catalogue. But the company's decision to license the hit "All You Need Is Love" to pharmaceutical and cosmetics firm Proctor & Gamble is a "surprise" to John Lennon's widow Yoko Ono, because they had always given her advance n

Fear Not, Haiku Friday is upon us!!!!!

And you all thought that we would be depriv3ed of this tradition just because Osler flew to Jupiter for 20 days.

Would I let that happen?

Here are some suggested topics:

McMansions

Who invented the Disco Ball?

Escargot

Psychotherapy

Ladies who Lunch sans clothing

Bad dogs, evil toddlers and the gnomes who love them

Alberto Gonzalez

Osler's intergalactic holiday

Luthiers who vacuum their lawns


here is my entry for the week:

leftover sushi.
Should I take it home and cook
it? Nah. Feed to cat.


Judge of this week's HAIKU is.... Ginger Hunter. because she must get tired hunting all of that ginger. She needs a break. THe winner gets to pick the next winner!

Pics of where I live...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Here are views of just outside the front door, looking toward "the Greenspace" then a look at our back alley where six houses have their garage doors open up to..... at the end of the alley there is a very small park. Then a look at our tiny garage note how my teeeny Toyota car and Bill Ginormous speakers takes up most of it....

Not great not terrible but this is it, such as it is....

Why Boogie is a Bad Dawg.....

Look at this poor gentleman here.... He used to have an upper torso, then Boogie made a snack of him.... This is allll that is left.
Bad Dawg.

OOPS!! Where I live:

This is where I live in McFake McFrance. We live here in this Faux Chateau.

We are renting this house until our Sploded house is demolished and then built again. This is one of those totally contrived planned communities, and all of the English/ French houses surround little parks, and this thing in the middle called The Village... which will contain a Starbucks, of course. We will be moved into our new house probably by the time they build the pool.
Its not a BAD HORRIBLE place to live There are kids and the parents and people are nice enough but its a LITTLE stuffy.. the backyard is very small and all of the houses are very close together.

Its nothing like Canby, or our old house or neighbors... In Canby our neighborhood is like a huge family and we really do all look out for each other and hang out every day.

All About Me.

Oh Enough about me.. Let's hear about YOU!!! What are YOU doing this summer? I am rebuilding my 'sploded house, working and taking excellent care of my husband and young son Spencer. I am pretty much the perfect wife and mother. My house is immaculate, my child is very well adjusted and my husband vacuums the back yard. We never ever have frozen food, and there are no empty coffee to go cups in my car.

Ok well my house DID explode..........

Wearing a New Hat Today.... Blogger

Even though it looks like a Spiderman Wastebasket....

Well Kids.. Now that I have done this I cannot think of anything to write Can you believe it?????

I am sure I will get the hang of it...

Sad news that no one talked about... Tom Snyder died. I liked that guy a lot. I really liked his second version of "Tomorrow " which was on CBS I think sponsored by Letterman or something. I thought he was hilarious. I guess if there were famous or historical people I could meet he would have been one of them. Along with, of course, Princess Diana, Lillian Hellman, Truman Capote, Joan Miro, Picasso, Ernest Hemmingway. Isak Dineson, Brian Boitano, and a bunch of other figure skaters, David Letterman, Cary Grant, I dunno a couple of other people...

WHo would you meet? I know this is a lame question, but its the first day.....